Getting ready. I'm not smiling because I'm a nervous wreck!
She was a little nervous the night before, but in the morning she was beyond excited. Like annoying excited.
I think she was done with pictures by now.
I should NOT be sick to my stomach, but I am and the two cups of diesel coffee at Chickfila didn't help. My baby, my sweet little girl, mi corazon left me today. I know it shouldn't feel this way. I KNOW she's going to have a ton of fun, make new friends and maybe learn some stuff but I'm going to miss her so much. We've been each other's buddy for five years now. Until this day, we've spent almost every waking moment together. She's my helper, my buddy, my shadow, my world. And for all of you rolling your eyes and saying that it's not healthy for your kids to be your world, let me just say... wait. Just wait until they place your first born in your arms and you can't breathe. Your whole life doesn't change; you are born. Wait until you spend the first three months of her life jumping out of bed because you think you hear her crying. When you're begging for just a moment of peace and quiet and then she's gone and you can't wait to see her again. Just wait until they take your heart out of your chest and place it in hers. You are never whole again, because pieces of you are walking around in this big scary world that you cannot control. Just wait, you'll see, you'll know and you wouldn't have it anyother way.
I guess, if I stop and calm down a bit, once the caffeine wears off, I know that even if I could control everything I wouldn't because then her life wouldn't be anywhere close to wonderful. But right now the excitement, fear and pain are just jumbled up into tears. I miss my baby and I have exactly two hours to dry my face and suck it up before I have to paste my smile on and gather up the little piece of my heart that has been gone all day.Happy First Day of School baby girl.