Monday, March 16, 2009

Please don't feel sorry for me

Please don't look at me like that. I knew what I was getting myself into when I got pregnant and still had two small children at home. Well maybe not AT the time, but like the midwife says, "If you're not, NOT trying then your trying."

To the moms at swim class:

Yes, I carried my almost two year-old, kicking and screaming, under my arm into my daughter's swim class while 7 months pregnant, BUT we were late and I do remember reading in some parent manual that the "football" hold is good for something??? Besides, when I did the math, these damn classes cost more than I'm willing to admit, so we were NOT going to be late.

To the little old lady at Randalls:

I really wasn't going to leave my child in the store. You see sometimes they don't listen and I'm too round to chase after them. Lord knows it'd be a chase too, because he was standing next to the candy with that little twinkle in his eye. You know the "let's play" twinkle. So I resorted to a threat and wouldn't you know he called my bluff. So what's a mom to do? I left the store and hid behind the pillar. Now stop shaking your head; the security guy was right there and watching us the whole time and if things got really ugly I would have sent my 3 year old after him. Now SHE'S fast!! After you left from being so disgusted with my parenting techniques, my son saw that I meant business and came running out looking for me. We talked ( in caveman-speak, of course) about how he needs to stay close to mommy, because it's dangerous if he gets lost. There were kisses and wiping of tears and lessons learned. Now I've just got to work on my 3 year-old's fear of abandonment.

To the man walking by my house and looking in the window:

I promise I'm not crazy. I know you usually see me running around with half naked kids and you probably think that the neighborhood is going to crap. We are good people. Promise. When you happened to look in the window I wasn't losing my mind. Cursing and yelling to myself, yes! but for a good reason. You see I was trying to wrap a freakin' guitar for my husband's birthday. It's the shape of the damn thing, because I swear I'm a good wrapper. And who in the hell designed tape so that as soon as you tear it off, it curls up and sticks to itself???? I had to try and un-stick it with one hand because I couldn't let go of the wrapping paper that was strategically placed in the one spot that would keep me from running out of paper and just wrapping the damn thing in foil. So you see, completely rational behavior. I'm okay now though, don't worry I got the thing wrapped and hidden in the car. I'm just going to tell hubby that the kids helped.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY !!




2 comments:

Emily Brown said...

hahahaha. All im getting from this is "maybe you should think twice before trying to get pregnant with a VERY stubborn one year old because 7mo pregnant with a very stubborn 2 year old isn't as fun as it sounds?"

hehehe hang in there.

Rebecca said...

Oh!!!!
I've been there down to the people looking in my window. Ben was standing on the table & they just needed to let me know (I knew.) You do SO much and are SUCH a great mommy, your kids, when they are all grown up will show it.
I don't feel sorry for you, but I do empathize. I've btdt... it's hard!!! Hugs!