What the hell!?

What's that saying? "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!"

Allie dresses and undress a.l.l.d.a.y.l.o.n.g. And yes it was just as painful for me to type all of those periods as it is for me to wash all the extra laundry. This outfit is actually "in" though. I double checked the other day, by checking out some teenagers. Who would have ever thought the 80's would come back? I'm throwing in the rag and dressing crazy with her. Who knows it might even be the "in thing" this fall. Fairy princess/pirate/tea party? It could catch on... Someone who has time to keep up with that stuff should post and let me know. Thanks.

Martin is all about his penis right now. He wants it free to experience the world without barriers just like his hands. I guess I can't blame him. I'll spare you the pictures, though- my husband would kill me and I'm sure it's illegal, too. On this day, he felt like his two favorite things should be housed together. Yeah, we had a little talk about protecting mommies future grandkids.

Benito loves his chi chi. I've tried stretching out feedings, crying, a little formula. He's a stubborn little fella and willing to let everyone know it! Whatever!!! I give up!!!

I'm walking around topless with a bebe on my boob, Martin bare butt to the wind like a Scottsman and Allie dressed like the crazy ladies in Grey Gardens. At least the rolls are cute? Well they're all kinda cute, that's why I keep them around. So if you have the stomach to come a callin', please wait about 15minutes for us to open the door after you ring the bell. We'll all be running around getting decent.

I've lost my mojo

I just can't get my swing back.

I decided to cave to peer pressure and enroll my kids in a few classes. Normally, I'd say I'm a play-outside-because-it's-free-and-good-for-you kinda mom and really? aren't classes this young kinda like sex in the hot tub? A waste of time, but you keep trying because somewhere you heard it was fun. Yeah, I quit. We'll wait a few more months and try again... just like we did with...

I feel like I'm just chasing my tail all day long. With the intense swim classes... which totally make me feel like a loser mom who can't keep the house clean, the clothes washed and the peoples fed just because I threw one measly 30 min. class into my schedule... my house is messy and I swear every time I wash the damn clothes they just multiply instead of actually get cleaned and put away. Oh and throw in a little boy who strips down every turn of the hour, a little missy who has a minimum of three tea parties a day - with water - and a bebe who didn't get the memo that it's time to eat every 4-5 hours instead of 2! and there you have it ladies and gents... where I've lost my mojo. I have fond memories of being able to handle it all. Clean floors. Homemade meals. Smiling and laughing with the kids. Brushing my teeth before noon. I'll spare you some of the other details, lest they get back to my extended family which would only result in lots of tsk, tsks and secret phone calls. But there is hope. I quit swim classes to the cheers of a little man in the house - and momma too!-, the weather's nice and if I can just clean my house I might be able to find where in the hell I put my mojo. I'd love to have it back.

A few good finds

When I get a few hours to myself this is what I enjoy doing. A "new" kitchen stool for my babies to sit on while helping me cook. A few cute hankies for our runny noses this fall and a desk for all sorts of coloring and playing school.

Do you ever have days when you want more... or less... maybe just different? That strong urge to turn something completely upside down is festering in me right now and I have no idea how it will manifest itself. Redecorating? Moving? Career change? Lifestyle change? Hubby is scared.

Sky in the hillcountry, Texas.

Whoa there Nelly

You know how one moment things are running as smooth as they can.? Everyone, eats, bathes, and things seems almost normal? But as soon as you think it... as soon as you say... "Oh, everything's gr..reaaa..... " It all blows up? Yeah, that's where I've been. My kids were abducted by aliens... or wait maybe their Changelings ... no, I think they have to be babies to be Changelings *... well, then just Benjamin, the other two were abducted, but either way it's been a little crazy here with every body having a new catch phrase and all the adjusting that goes with that! So on any given day at any given moment insert these new phrases into any of your family's conversations and well, you'll be us.

Hubby: Fan-tas-tic!! (yes, super annoying. you can see my eyes rolling already, huh?)
Me: Are you kidding me!?!
Allie: What-e-ver (really she's only FOUR!)
Martin James: No I do it!
Benjamin: whaaaaaa ::snort, snort:: whaaaaaa

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Background: It's early evening and hell has broken loose. Hubby just got home and wants to play with the kids. We are supposed to be at Mimi's house in five minutes for my Dad's birthday. Kids just woke up from a nap and need to get dressed. Baby is crying.

Me: Ok, guys let's get ready to go to Mimi's. Allie your clothes are on the bed, start getting dressed. Martin let's go to the potty before we leave.
Hubby: grumbling. Fan-tas-tic
Allie: What-ev-er Mom!
Me: Eyes buggin' out. grunts Are you kidding me?
In the bathroom.
Me: Ok Buddy, let me...
Martin: NO!! I do it!!You go by door. Leave me lone.
Me: Ok, but just let me...
Martin: NOOOOO I DO IT!!
Me: Fine, let's get to it. (I laugh to myself. Haha that rhymes)

Martin get's his underwear down in a record two minutes and gets on the pot. He's adjusted himself accordingly and starts to pee... all over me. Somehow it escaped through the hole between the two seats. **Really someone needs to invent a pee-through-the-hole-blocker!!*

Me: ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!
Hubby: (running to the scene of the crime) Wha?? Sees pee all over me, floor, and with the aide of some magical talent -I don't know, maybe inherited- on the WALL. Fan-tas-tic.
Me: Yeah (rolling eyes). You're turn!

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So yeah, where was I... We've had normal crazies here with a new personality joining the group and then throw in Hubby's new health problem, a four day trip to SeaWorld with a three month old, a wonky computer, newly potty trained two year old and a teething baby and whaaalaa! No time to blog. So here's the last two weeks in pictures, because I've at least uploaded those.

Yeah so maybe not. Someone ::coughhubbycough:: took more pictures of the animals than our kids.

First family picture. Yup! Starting Jillian's Shred videos on Monday.

Calling Shamoo

Petting and feeding the dolphins.

That's all folks!

* I'm reading Outlander by Diana Gabaldon and I LOVE it. So yeah, that's where the poem from earlier and "changeling" came from.

I bid thee farewell my summer.
You were harsh and quick with your fiery lashes.
And now when our finger tips are reaching out for just one last touch,
I know I will miss you 'til next summer,
When we can tumble in our torturous union once again.

Silence is Golden

Well except for when I need to make an appointment or answer the phone....

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I woke up on Wednesday mute. Not even a crack in my voice. Gone. The first thing that erupted in my mind was How in the hell am I going to yell at my kids? But then I remembered when I lost my voice as a teacher, I managed 30 some odd kids and they all listened and we didn't burn the building down so surely I could do it with three???

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So being mute for some reason has effected my ability to write. I don't know, maybe it's because I'm quiet and my mouth is directly connected to my brain? or fingers? Maybe all this peace and quiet has made me a normal, functional person and that leaves me with nothing to talk about. Maybe I'm so exhausted from having to listen to everyone all day since I can't tell them to shut up that I can't fathom the idea of interacting with more people even if it is just blogging or facebook?

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Finally on Friday after perfecting my scary whisper-yell, I thought I could manage a Target run. Yeah, I know it's some sort of masochistic sickness. But you know what, we had a wonderful trip. Really, it was like I rented some kids and was in a parallel universe where the moms don't yell and the kids don't throw stuff, scream, or fight. And I even threw another ball into the pit, because my big boy Martin is no longer in diapers. So I was willing to bet my second born child ;) that he would have pooped on the floor or at least peed on someone. Nope. We all managed our bodily fluids like all-stars! I'm guessing since I couldn't run my mouth very much, the kids paid attention, that and when I DID parted my lips the voice of Zuul from Ghostbusters came out. Scary.


Oh but we couldn't leave Target without at least one head tilting event. My children we being angels in the produce section and some nice old lady wanted to squeeze their cheeks, of course. Now usually, I step in and guide my kids through a polite conversation and you know try to steer the pinching fingers away from the frightening children. Well I couldn't this time. Allie got ahead of me and I couldn't shout, "HEY, get your cheesy smelling hands off my kid!!!" So I did the second best thing and smiled while I drove our basket to rescue Allie. The lady in the meantime is asking Allie a question that apparently she didn't feel like answering because she was too busy picking bananas for us. She asked a few more times and since I couldn't get Allie's attention without pssst-ing, clapping or slamming my hand against my leg (I save the dog calls for home use only) I just smiled. What else could I do? So get this, the lady, looks straight at me, with Allie now in arms reach and says, "Oh yeah, she probably doesn't speak English." gah....!!!!!!*eyes popping out, jaw dropping* It's amazing what people will tell you when you don't stop them.

I mustered up all the voice I had managed to save that day and wasted it on three very clear words (well in my Zuul voice). "YES SHE DOES!" Those three words have set me back two days. Still no voice.

I'm filing this moment with the "Are you the nanny?" one.

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You tell them baby!! We've got a special kind of English for comments like that!!!